Halloween is over. Thanksgiving is rapidly approaching, which means that Christmas is right around the corner. We also have two family birthdays – one right before Christmas and one soon after New Years. It always feels like a whirlwind.
How will we celebrate Christmas this year in light of a desire to keep clutter to a minimum and experiences and relationships as the focus? How can we simplify the holidays?
Christmases Past
Growing up, birthdays and Christmas were the main times that we received gifts. When I was decluttering our photos it was fun to see photos of us as children opening gifts on Christmas morning. There were usually clothes, books, and some kind of toy. We always had the Lifesavers book that they sell at Christmas time in our stocking. There was usually a fire in the fireplace and a big Christmas turkey. I still have the Winnie the Pooh book series that I received as a gift one Christmas.
My husband and I as a general rule only give gifts to the children on their birthdays and at Christmas as well. This means there is a lot of build up to these two special occasions for the kids and also for me (the main gift purchaser). They have in the past kept an Amazon wish list, putting things on there that strikes their fancy. I’ve learned, however, that the things that strike their fancy don’t usually last in keeping their attention when they actually receive them.
There’s a delicate balance that we haven’t quite reached yet in balancing out the kids’ desires and parents’ wisdom when it comes to gift giving. I’m definitely guilty of being swayed by my sons’ pleading and persuasive arguments…which is how we got the XBox last Christmas.
How are you planning on simplifying the holidays this year? Reflections on what has worked in… Click To TweetHow We Simplify the Holidays
One way that we keep Christmas simple on my side of the family, is to only give gifts to the children. We’ve done this for years now. As the children get older, however, and prefer gift cards and money over actual gifts, the joy of opening gifts on Christmas morning is fading. This is also another reason that I would love to move more towards shared experiences as the bulk of the holiday celebrations.
My husband’s side of the family has always done two separate Pollyannas – one for the adults and one for the children. Each adult gets one gift from another adult, and each child gets one gift from another cousin. It’s another way to keep Christmas simple and the focus on Christ and our relationships. Last year the Pollyanna was made optional. Another year we shared “gifts/talents” with one another instead of exchanging presents.
In the weeks leading up to the Holidays, I plan on sharing ideas about how we can keep the Holidays simple, less stressful, and clutter free. I’m eager to hear from you as well!
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What steps have you taken to simplify the Holidays?
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I’ve been trying to move towards just experience gifts lately – my family is on board, my husband’s side not so much. But there aren’t really any kids left in the family so until we have one of our own, I’m going to keep pushing for it! And probably even once we do have kids honestly.
That’s great Alexandra. What kind of experiences are you thinking about?
The biggest thing we have done towards simplifying the holiday is putting up less decorations, both inside and out. It takes less time to set up and take down, plus the house doesn’t look so cluttered. I also whittled my cookie baking down to our two favorites – fudge and peanut butter balls; neither are really Christmas cookies, but I only make them at Christmas.
Those sound like great steps to take to simplify the holidays Lisa. Thank you for sharing!
Hi Angela, I’ve never heard gift exchanges called Pollyannas before. Neat!
This year, the adults decided to draw names, only those who wanted to participate will get a gift. And there’s only 5 kids under 18, so they will all get gifts. (My birth family, with spouses, kids, except my dad and his wife who are not involved in our lives. Long story there.)
My dad’s side of the family just quit gifts all together. It’s just too expensive! I just feel really blessed if I get to visit with any of them during Dec!
Also, I’ve decided since I now have a married daughter, and a grandchild to host my little family for Thanksgiving, with my ex being invited, since he’s the girls’ dad. My mother nearly had a breakdown over it, but that’s the way it’s going to be. We were still going to my grandmothers till after I was married, and my mom always wanted our own, but dad wouldn’t let her. But, I guess she has forgotten that. Anyway, sorry for the book!
I don’t decorate excessively at all. A tree, and a few other ornaments on the walls. No outside displays at all. Except a Jesus is the reason lawn sign.
But, since I have a 2 yr old grand baby, I do want to make cookies this year. But they will be slice and bake! I’m not a cook!
Thank you so much for sharing Melinda! I think your statement about feeling blessed if you get to visit with your dads side of the family shows that relationships are more important than gifts for you. Cookies are definitely a must!
This year, my ex bought a museum membership for PP. I love it! So does she! Besides making cookies, I’m only buying them clothes. They both already have too many toys here!
Memberships are great! You’re able to use it all year!
I remember those Lifesavers books! Putting our initials on the photos in the Sears Wishbook was the Amazon wishlist of the 70s, hahaha.
My kids are still young, but I’ve been hinting to the grandparents about “experience” gifts for the kids. They just have all the toys they need, and I’d love to see them receive gifts that create memories.
It’s great that you’re thinking about this early Abby. I would have loved a children’s museum membership back when the kids were little so that the grandparents could have taken them regularly!
Our youngest is 15. He still gets some gifts, but my husband and I and the three adult kids just do a grab bag exchange. Simple shopping and little, if anything, to store (we encourage consumables but don’t require them).
That’s interesting Christy. I haven’t heard of a grab bag. Is that like a white elephant?
I have been doing gifts of experiences with my siblings this year. 2 weekend road trips, 1 concert, 1 trip to the rock-climbing gym and 1 camping trip. It is fun since we are starting to part ways with college, etc. At this point in life, time spent together is more important than gifts of stuff.
That’s wonderful Brooke! Those sound like really special times with your siblings.
Every year we buy too much, and every year the top toy is a box one of the toys came in.
I get frustrated that my kids have too much, but guess who gave them too much? (haha it’s my husband, not me! But I’m complicit!)
It’s true! Kids are pretty simple in their interests aren’t they?
This whole year has seen a shift in how we approach gifts, referencing experiences over things. for birthdays. It didn’t occur to me that we should also extend this approach to Christmas. In the past I’ve tried to stick with hand crafted items and consumables. Thanks for getting me thinking about just what we should do this year.
Thanks for sharing Stella. We’re the opposite – we buy gifts for birthdays and do more experiences for the holidays! I love the idea of crafts and consumables for gifts. I’m not terribly crafty though!
Great points and ideas! As we all get older and families grow, it gets harder and harder to buy for everyone. Thanks so much for sharing with The Alder Collective (and congrats on the feature). Looking forward to having you link up again this week!
Thanks Kelsie! It does get harder, especially as people buy what they want when they want it!